Some people in this Nigeria are professionals at swallowing Panadol for other people's headaches SHA! Good God! They not only cry more than the bereaved, thesedays they now offer themselves in place of the departed. I wish they could experience an out of body moment and see how they look. I usually just let them be, but looks like that is why we are now having more and more of them. I have decided they will be hearing from me anytime they cross my path.
During the Obasanjo regime, I was MC at an event where the First Lady, Late Mrs Stella Obasanjo, was hosting wives of ECOWAS heads of government, to a dinner. It so happened that the podium I was working from was unusually high, even for me. So when it was time for the First Lady's speech I met her half way towards the podium and told her to speak from the high table. She whispered a word of gratitude and did like I suggested. Months later at another event at the Banquet Hall of the Presidential Villa, Obasanjo called me and asked that he heard I went to an event and said That the First Lady was short. Before I could defend myself, Baba interrupted and asked if I knew why he married Stella... No sir, I said. Well I married her because during the war, we had to carry our wives and run. So I married somebody who I could carry.
That kind of over sabi thingy played itself out today at the event I am working at. While waiting for guests to arrive, I went round to say hello to the "who is who" of the corporate world. And one lady who is a member of the planning committee, did not even respond to my greeting like the rest did. She said "EHEN! Ali Baba, be careful, no expensive jokes today o!" One of the Edozien brothers wanted to jump to my defence. I said no sir. Let me hear one of such expensive jokes that you have heard me tell that you consider offensive. And she must have thought she was going to nail me, she said, "what of the joke when you said Obasanjo wanted to give you money and then he heard that you were paid N1million and he said he wasn't giving you again". HOW IN A DONKEY'S BALLS, IS THAT AN EXPENSIVE JOKE? That is besides the fact that I did not say the joke (if that could even pass for a joke) that was something Baba said at a dinner in honour of the new PDP chairman at the time.
Is that what you consider an expensive joke? I asked her. Something Obasanjo said himself? Madam please get your facts right or stop tainting people's professional integrity. I did not get to this point in my career by joking with my job. Please be guided. I added. Another member of the committee at that point said, "Ali it's ok. Just give us a good show."
After 23+ years of striding this comedy scene, should I be the one teaching people that there is a thin line between being funny and being offensive? That's what one PMS influenced frustrated she goat wants to teach me. No be her fault, like say I GREE do her 60th birthday for free, I bet I would have been the best comedian she ever knew! Rubbish!
Don't nobody tell me it's enough. I DEY vex.
Not saying anything would have given her the nerve to repeat that crap again. Some people just deleted their common sense and downloaded stupidity. And pass it off as over sabi. Let's not tolerate them anymore. They must reboot and reload factory setting.
Enough is enough!